If I Could I Would…Go on a Gutka spitting spree

Life is full of regrets- dreams not chased, love not reciprocated, the new I phone not bought…

Sometimes, I like to write down the things I would like to change, but either don’t have the time for, the inclination to pursue, or even the dedication for… But hey! What are the odds that it will strike a chord with someone reading it and my could, finds someone who would? Here goes:

i-wish-header

If I could I would…

  • Take the time out, stop and help traffic policemen in their job. How many times have you seen them stop a car or truck in the middle of the road while handing them a violation challan? How many times you wish you could stop and ensure the challan-ed vehicles get parked on the side to avoid further jams.
  • Eat gutka and go on a spitting spree. Drive from one end of the city to the other, to find all those educated new sedan owners who have clearly misinterpreted the line- Paint the town Red! and give their clothes a nice gutka shower.
  • Stop every water tanker that I see with it’s tap opened by thoughtless people and shut the water outlet avoiding water wastage, whilst making sure that the lovely souls who open these back taps in their bid to have fun are sentenced to a week of life without water, hoping they understand the value of it.
  • Make the man leering at a passing girl, see his sisters face in her. That definitely ought to help cool his hormones.
  • Help each and every homeless person sleeping on the road, find a roof over their heads. God knows, what we will born with in our next life!
  • Strap a horn to the ear of that superbly annoying two wheeler rider, who thinks he is in a video game and keeping his hand on the horn will kill all his enemies, elevating him to the next game level!
  • Use the satellite’s video feed to prove to the copper who stops me on the charge of crossing a red light, that while it was still green when I crossed the junction, it was Mother cow standing in the middle of the road, that led me to the traffic violation!
  • Use a magic carpet to transport my lifeline’s (also known as the hired help) whole village including the cows, farms and her relatives year on year so she never has to leave for gaon.
  • Make a masseuse appear out of thin air, just as I was heading to sleep every night for that 15 minutes of foot therapy that promises the sweetest of dreams.
  • Make CEO’s of telecom companies who boast of their amazing network, sit in my house when they have that most important investor call and see their face turn red when the call drops!
  • Make drivers honking away at the rickshaw puller in front of them on a single file road, carry a 30 kilo weight on their back, so they understand the logic behind the rickshaw’s inability to go faster.

Did I read your mind? Would love to hear from you on which- If I could I would,  resonated the most with you…

-Mansi Mehta

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Advertisements

One thought on “If I Could I Would…Go on a Gutka spitting spree

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s