A day in the life of Modern India #isthisyou?

It din’t hit me till I went to spend a night at my parents house last weekend… but I am a prisoner of technology. What you are about to read is going to be so familiar, that I expect your eye widening and blush deepening!

So here’s recounting a normal Friday

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#Fitbit beeps into my dreamy state ‘ It’s time to wake up, our goal for today 8000 steps, Let’s Go!’ 

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#Mydietcoach reminds me that today’s breakfast options are boiled egg or fruit smoothie.

Damn! takes all the fun of waking up in my mum’s house, see you later cheese omelette and gobhi paranthas!

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#Uber checks in with me ‘ Heading out? Use #work for discount’

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#DailyWater worriedly reminds me ‘You have not had any water since morning, you have 8 glasses to go ‘

“Uh-oh! As my board room meeting develops into a war zone, I would be lucky to get a pee break. Water must wait!”

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#Mydietcoach is back with my lunch options- Grilled sandwich or a bowl of daal.

“Little did it know, lunch was actually 6 cups of masala chai and 8 Bourbon biscuits!”

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#BigBasket notification beeps. ‘Out of rice? It’s time for your weekly grocery replenishment’

“Out of rice? I am out of my mind right now! My laptop just crashed on me ….and no I had not saved my file!!!”

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#DailyWater sends me a pic of a wrinkled fruit ‘You are dehydrated, have a litre of water to remain on the daily goal’

“Well actually my friend I am demoralised, dejected & depressed. I am sure you agree dehydrated is the least of my concerns”

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#SportsSocial pings me ‘ Playing Badminton today? There are 3 confirmed players for a 6pm play. Confirm you?’

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Phone alarm goes off ‘Don’t forget to pick up the drycleaning ‘

“Drycleaning? With this crazy traffic I will be lucky to reach my court on time”

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#Mydietcoach send me the dinner menu. I look at that and the butter chicken the husband is devouring …as I click Remind me Later.

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#Fitbit says ‘It’s time to rest, Goodnight’

“If it wasn’t for the fact that its soon going to be Saturday, I would be crying!”

After failing my daily app goals, its time for me to work harder… after all it all begins again at 830 am Monday morning!

 

Download the apps you like below

GET FIT WITH FITBIT

FIND YOUR FAV SPORT &PLAYER

THE WATER GUIDE

STOCK YOUR CUPBOARDS

 

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THE ‘DO-NOT GIFT THIS VALENTINES’ GUIDE

Of course, it’s not easy! and Of course, it requires weeks of research. So if you don’t want your bu** kicked make sure your Valentines Gift does not feature in the following list!

FOR HER

PERFUME– Seriously are you trying to comment on her personal hygiene? You can imagine yourself whats its gonna sound like, when you gift her a fragrance.

Hi baby here’s a perfume coz I don’t like how you smell.

 

rr

ROSES- This is so passe, that it’s not even funny! At the fortune you spend on a bunch of 20, you could get ride free on Uber for a month. What could give you an advantage however is plating a rose tree named after your loved one in the neighbourhood park. Wat an #IDEA Sirji!

 

r1

CHOCOLATES–       ‘Kuchch meetha ho jaye ‘ sounds great on TV, but you really don’t want her spending all her extra time at the gym. All thanks to your chocolate gift box!

FOR HIM

SHIRTS-

‘The closest you can get to your boy freind when you are not around him’

Sure it sounds ultra romantic, but it’s a piece of mass production! Mother’s gift Shirts, Colleague’s gift shirts , Girl friends DO NOT gift shirts!

CUFFINKS– Another classic Valentines blunder! First no one wears cufflinks anymore, unless they are quirky like a camera cufflink for a photographer etc . Secondly every man I know has at least 10 cufflinks in their wardrobe, for the 5 occasions in the year when they need to wear them! I hope you get the point.

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GADGETS– Now we all know why this is a bad idea. If you are tech challenged like most of us, you will end up getting him something that is rated 4.8/5 ! Blunder no 1. You may further end up picking a model that has only 49 features, 2 less than his current device! Blunder no 2.  I hope you cancel this thought before I have to list Blunder no 3.

 

With so many No No’s what should you get your Valentine this year ?

Well, if you are naive enough to think beauty queens can help achieve World Peace, I guess you thought reading this article could answer the million dollar question

‘What’s the perfect gift to buy for your Valentine  ‘

Up , Up and away my darling Valentine…

COVER PIC CREDIT: ONEINCHPUNCH – FOTOLIA

If you just heard the word Valentines on the lunch table today and are totally shitting bricks of what to do – Pack your partners bag and surprise them with one of these holiday breaks this 14th February weekend

***BANGKOK, THAILAND***

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Why not I ask? Tickets will be equivalent to travelling within India . Visa is on arrival . With domestic air traffic it takes the same time to fly to Goa as to Bangkok.

Massages, Cocktails by the pool,  Weekend markets. This south asian holiday ticks all the right boxes.

 

***TREE HOUSE RESORT, JAIPUR***

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Super relaxing and magical. Living in an actual tree house will take you back to your childhood. The romantic setting and secluded space is perfect for workaholics to rekindle the love.

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BOOK YOUR TREE HOUSE GETAWAY NOW

 

***LUXURY CAMP, RISHIKESH***

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6 hour drive from Delhi, turn this weekend into an adventure. Camp by the river in the night, bunjee jump, raft or kayak in the day. This holiday promises to rejuvenate you in more ways than one.

PLAN YOUR OWN ADVENTURE NOW

 

***KANHA NATIONAL PARK, MADHYA PRADESH***

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One of the most sought after Tiger Reserves, Kanha National Park has been portrayed by Rudyard Kipling in his novel ‘The Jungle Book’.  A personal safari, could show your partner how much you love them.

COMPILED BY MANSI MEHTA

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